"And did she make my hair?": How my 2-year-old is forming an Image of God

Lately my daughter has been asking about God.  It all started with a conversation about dandelions in late Spring.  I've always found the sprinkle of yellow throughout  green lawn quite charming and I'd gladly adorn a sweet dandelion crown or set the kitchen table with a dandelion bouquet, while I watch others go through environmentally unfriendly efforts to avoid them. So I found myself sitting on the porch with my daughter this spring as she asked me what kind of flowers were popping up throughout the lawn.  She wants to know the names of all flowers.  I don't usually know them, so instead they are "pink flowers" or "big flowers" to me.  But these ones I knew, and so I told her, "They're dandelions.  Many people will tell you they're weeds, but I say they're beautiful because God made them."

"GOD made them!!??" My daughter quickly replied, surprised, confused, intrigued. "Who is God?" She knows about God, at least as much as any 2 year old Pastor's Kid knows about God, but I knew she was looking for me to explain more specifically.  

"Yes, sweetheart, God made everything-- the trees, the clouds, you and me."

"The house?" 

"Well, no, but God made the people who made the house."

For Evelyn, a conversation which she doesn't quite understand, but she feels intrigued by tends to repeat itself.  So every time she saw a dandelion for quite some time, she'd start this conversation over again, "Who made that?!"  She knew the answer but she wanted to hear me say it again. 

This recurred once or twice a day for a week or two. 

"Did God make this spaghetti?"

"Did God make my brother?
"Did God make this potty?" 

To inanimate objects I would always reply, "No, but God made the person who made that (house, spaghetti, potty)," and that answer was acceptable to her growing spiritual mind. 

Finally one afternoon we were having this very conversation when she finally said, "And did she make my hair?" 

I paused as I heard her use her first-ever pronoun for God, and that it was a female pronoun.  I was surprised as I felt a warmth and a pride swell up in my heart, and said, "Yes, she made your hair." 

I very rarely use pronouns for God, believing that God does not fit inside a specific gender. I know that's not easy for everyone, but I happen to think it's worth the effort and after a few weeks or months of it, it becomes quite natural.  Having learned about God so far only in the context of inclusive language, Evelyn hadn't used a pronoun for God either.  She never asked.  She never seemed to question it. It didn't seem to matter to her until this moment, when she finally used a pronoun and it was a female one.  

I find it fascinating to see the way that the image of the Old Bearded Man Sitting On a Throne on a Cloud doesn't have to be the default childhood image of God.  For so long I've believed that must be the universal image of God when a young faith is just blossoming.  That's how God was always painted in murals and how God was constructed in stained glass, and how I saw God until I was...I dunno... 20? and "He" is so much easier to say than adjusting the phrasing of a sentence to render a pronoun unnecessary.  "He" often fits better into hymns and praise songs.  "He" is the default because for so long we have lived in a patriarchal world.  

Cultural constructs around gender are changing, and I see that change is already taking shape in the way my little girl's mind is forming.  She has no idea that women were ever considered less than men.  She has no idea that there's any power differential between her and her brother, between her daddy and I.  She has no reason to believe that the One who created us has to be male.  

I don't know how long she'll see God as female, and that's not what matters to me.  What matters to me is that she develops an image of the Divine that works for her specific and individual relationship with God, and not just what some Sunday School curriculum or picture book has told her God looks like.  I love that she is a part of our church, with our Sunday School teacher, Miss Olivia, who is open to the unique interpretations our kids come up with, and that she's a part of this time and place where cultural constructs are being questioned and challenged, and where people are free to form their own ideas.

--Pastor Joanna

Sermon Reflection Times TWO! | August 18, 2013; August 25, 2013

Hi Church and Church Followers!
I skipped last week's blog post, and I regret it because I liked the message I preached.  You see, the truth is (thou shalt not lie) occasionally I skip a blog post because I am not particularly pleased with the way the message comes across and I feel like it's one that I'll just let slip through the cracks.  They're all on the website, so if you REALLY want to listen you'll almost never miss one.  But last week, the post slipped through the cracks simply as a matter of prioritizing my work week, and the blog post fell to the bottom of the list.

So here!  I still won't do a full reflection, but I will post the MP3 and the scripture references.
August 18, 2013
Read: Psalm 80:1-2, 8-19; Hebrews 11:29-12:2
Listen: Patience


August 25, 2013
Read: Psalm 71:1-6, Jeremiah 1:4-10
Listen: God Is Still Creating
Dig a Little Deeper: 
Here are Meister Eckhart's words.  Originally written in German, this is a translation done by Matthew Fox.

"The Word of God is always 'in the beginning'. And this means that it is always
in the process of being born and is always already born.
     Now it is the nature of a word to reveal what is hidden. The Word that is
hidden still sparkles in the darkness and whispers in the silence. It entices us to
pursue it, to yearn and sigh after it.
     For it wishes to reveal something about God.
What is my name? What is your name? What is God's name?
Our name is:
          that we must be born.
And the Creator's name is:
          to bear.
The soul alone among all creatures is generative
like God is.
               We all are meant to be mothers of God.
In this birth you will discover all blessing.
    But neglect this birth and you neglect all blessing.
          Tend only to this birth in you and you will find there
all goodness and consolation,
     all delight, all being, and all truth.
 [...]
Every day a person bears fruit a hundred times
     or a thousand times or countless times giving birth and becoming fruitful out
of the noblest foundation of all."

Here's a Wikipedia article about who Meister Eckhart is.  I think I've said this before... I'm a shameless Wikipedia fan.  I know it's not for important citations, but it's awesome for quick info!

I'm interested in what you think about the idea that God is STILL creating and forming.  This is a big theological discussion.  First of all, it is an ancient and ongoing discussion about Theism vs. Deism.  Did God create the world and then step away from it (Deism), or did God create the world and continue to be involved in it (Theism)?  Second of all, the question is how much of a role does God play in your life today?  Do you think your life is predetermined by God (predestination) or that you have free will, and God is continuing to play a role in your decisions about your own future?

I'd love to have a sit-down and chat discussion about these things, but for now you can feel free to leave a comment.  Where are you on the Deism vs. Theism spectrum?  Where are you on the Predestination vs. Free Will spectrum?  And with those in mind, what do you think of the sermon I preached this week?  Is God Still Creating you?  

Sermon Reflection | Sunday June 9, 2013

Read: 1 Kings 17:8-24
Listen: God Will Provide
Dig a Little Deeper: 

     As I mentioned in my message, I'm reading the Psalms every morning as a Spiritual Discipline and as a form of prayer.  I put together a simple check list with a space to write when you read each Psalm and some brief thoughts about it, if you're interested in joining me and setting a goal.  My personal goal is to read one Psalm every day.  I'd love it if you'd join me in this!  Let me know if you do, just so I can have an idea of who is participating.  If you'd like a copy of the Psalms list, e-mail me at pastor@firstcongo.net and I'll send it to you! 

I have to say the Psalms challenge has started a lot of discussion in the D'Agostino household.  You may know that my husband is a poet.  That makes it easy for him to love the Psalms, of course.  They are poems.   Well, they are songs, but we read them usually without music.  He has been recognizing the way that a lot of religious poetry reflects the essential ideas/concepts of the Psalms-- rhythmically, conceptually, etc., and has even found some that he wants to put alongside one another as past and present compliments of each other.  This is a baby-idea for him, but I've asked him to find an example and share it on the blog sometime.  It may be a few weeks, but you might encourage him if you see him (or in the comments)! 

Okay, anyway, so on the topic of 1 Kings... I hope you'll just listen to the sermon.  I don't have a lot of follow-up on it.  You might read this commentary.  

Or you might just sit and think about these questions I asked in my sermon:

"Ask yourself, what fills you?  What rules your thoughts?  What takes up your time?  If you’re empty, how can God fill you?  If you’re full, how much of your fullness is God’s goodness and how much is junk food and negativity and unhelpful noise and hoarding.  Is your coffee can full of things that make it hard to open yourself up to God’s love and grace?  How can God come into us when we are already filled by earthly things? 

 And then, think-- how can God work through us when we remove those distractions and really concentrate and listen to what God is calling us to?  I’m not saying we should get rid of all of the activities we do, or that we should turn our church into a silent monastery and just listen; what I’m saying is that it’s time to clean out the spiritual junk food—the worry, the negativity, the bad stuff…and make room for God.  Make room for what is good and right.  Because the woman’s coffee can was empty, there was so much room for kindness and compassion and faith and mercy."

Another question:
When have you been served by the people you thought you were serving?  Or learned from the people you were teaching?

Well folks, the next three weeks I will be out of town.  I'm in North Carolina and my brother's home in Rockville, MD for about 10 days, and then off to the General Synod of the UCC for one week.  I am glad to go, and I will be glad to come home!  Come listen to Rev. Gary Miller and Dr. Brian Smith preach the next three weeks!

Peace!

Saying Thank You

As my time away from home is nearing an end (I'll in Ripon for the summer!), I am excited to share a recent experience that provoked classic, college kid introspection. Last week at my sophomore women's Bible Study, my minister invited a student from "Ask Big Questions UW-Madison" to facilitate a special discussion with my group. "Ask Big Questions" is an international organization whose mission is to engage college students in asking "big questions," in an effort to promote conversations that help us understand ourselves and others. Through these conversations that goal is to ignite positive change in the world.

http://askbigquestions.org/

UW-Madison began its own "Ask Big Questions" organization this year. The student representative from the group began our session by asking us what this quote mean to us: "Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond imagination. It is our light more than our darkness which scares us." --Marianne Williamson. This quote got us thinking about the tremendous power we possess and how we can use this power to impact our community and world.

Next the leader showed us this "Ted Talks"video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hVCBrkrFrBE

In summary the video highlights the impact each of use can have in one another's lives in ways we do not realize. We can all think of people who have shaped who we are or who have positively impacted us at some point. But, we all too often do not bother to let these people know they are appreciated. The take home message from the clip was the importance of acknowledging those people who have positively changed us by thanking them. They may very well not realize what an impact they have had in our lives and a simple thank you may, in turn, change their life. 

Earlier in the day, I was carbon copied in an email my dad sent to a friend who was soon to retire. He had heard that she was retiring from another friend and simply wanted to thank her for the profound impact she had had on our community and let her know her work over the years was greatly valued by him. His message was short and nothing spectacular was written. However, I am sure the woman found it meaningful that he would go out of his way to say thank you for her hard work.

I hope that I can embody the example my dad set last week by reaching out to those who have impacted my life and letting them know how much they mean to me. I say thank you often for small things people do for me, but seldom do I take time to reach out to those people who have radically changed my life. I think part of God's hope for us as a community of Christians is to share the deep gratitude we have with one another. If we are the body of Christ, shouldn't we strengthen ourself by forming stronger bonds through gratitude? The act of saying thank you can feel uncomfortable, but the difference it can make in the life of the recipient is extraordinary.

The message from that night had a strong impact on me, and I hope you can consider ways to reach out to others in thanks as well.